Oh! for editing a book.

November 8th, 2009

I never knew editing a book could cost so much money. Went to a very popular editor, A world famous editor in Lagos,  to  do the final editing and proof reading for my book before I roll out the impressions and I got the shocker.

The only thing they nearly didn’t ask for was my arm and leg. The bill was in 6 figures. I just couldn’t believe it. I am looking for other options now. The only two obstacles holding by books from coming out now are The editing and Rolling/ impressions. And I hope I cross them before the year ends.

Can’t wait to get the books into the readers hands.  Chill! if you are an ardent reader, you’ll get it soon….

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The Great magician and other Stories

November 8th, 2009
Thi is my first Published book

This is my first Published book

This is my first published book. Actually it was 3 years ago.And it may surprise you the stories in it were written when I was as small as nine years old. Being my First officially published work and a self-published book, there were so many errors but I am correcting them now and will be reprinting new copies soon.

The book; a Children’s classic was supposed to be quite different from your normal Children’s story book and indeed it was. Here is what the back blurb of the book says.

Back Blurb:

“I the great Magician and other stories, am one out of a series of Short stories, titled Sent Story. I am a classical Interesting work of art that aims at correcting of the amoral and immoral behaviour of Children, while at the same time improving their reading and comprehending ability. In my pages are seven  wonderful stories, a glossary of difficult words, questions to test understanding and the innovative learning techniques of games. I am a book of moral. Leisure, entertainment and education. Children love me, Adults adore me.

the magician with his great power intimidates,…an innocent boy sent out of school for an offence he never committed,…a gossip at 72 years,…bad advice given two 2 children by their parents, …Nono loses his bag,…what becomes of them all? find out in the book!

This is the excerpt from the upper part of the blurb. Maybe later I will put what was said about the Author and give you some of the comments from the readers that read the book.

I am currently doing a re-editing and a reprint of the book which will hopefully come out before the end of the year. Now that’s two books coming from me before the end of the year. Want a Free copy? Comment give me a reason why I should give you a free copy.

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I need Endoresments for my next Book (savannah Adventures)

October 6th, 2009

Yeah! Pls I need more comments, endorsements, rave reviews, rants, criticisms for my next book, Savannah Adventures; the book is about a school excursion in The National Game Reserve that went awry, its about all the pranks you played in Sec. School, Hair raising Adventures, Teenage Love, Responsibility, fear. Its about what we can learn as Human beings from Nature and the animals and from our own actions. Its quite entertaining and so Humourous. There I hope I need a good brief synopsis within the Pharagraph.

Interested in providing a review, feel free to make a comment here or and I will send it to you, the complete package. Pls handle with Care when I do send it to you and don’t plagilarise it or I will sue you beleive you me or worse still I will go down to my Village in the East and prepare a potent charm. :-)

See Below for some excerpts…

Excerpts From My Forthcoming book

September 21st, 2009

Here is Chapter one of my Next Book – Savannah Adventures

CHAPTER ONE

A guinea fowl crowed in the distance, waking the sun up from his slumber. He rose languidly from his bed in the horizon, exploding a brilliant sunshine and greeting everything in the Savanna Good Morning!  As his golden drops caressed them, giving life to the Living things and Death to the dead things: giving life to the day animals and plants and bidding the nocturnals good night. He cajoled the night to sleep, for the Day’s turn in watching the world in watching the deeds of men, animals and plants, even the deed of the dead as he took his seat comfortably in the sky.

Morning, found all the students, except one, still in their slumber, their body too weak to respond to the greetings of the sun, sneaking in through the rims and slits of the closed wooden windows into their small room. John was the only one responding.  John who was tall and handsome, in a now dirty, white shirt and blue jean Trousers; whose interests in life alternated between girls, particular Obiageli and studying, was wide awake and like the sun, was watching over his fellow students.  They were either lying or sitting in awkward postures by the walls of the small room.  His elderly eyes traveled round from one student to another.  It rested momentarily on the student on the left side of him, Aminu Gwagda.

Aminu Gwagda was in the same class, Senior Secondary School 3 (SS3), as John and had recovered earlier, during the night from his unconsciousness, but had fallen again into another era of unconsciousness, as a result of the beating he received during the “who told you?  How did you know? And who else knows?” interrogation.  This had added more wounds to his already mauled slim body; a bleeding arm and a cut behind the ear.

John’s eyes swept from Aminu to the person sitting next to him on the same wall, Paulinus.  Congealed blood was caked from the corner of Paulinus’s mouth down to his chin and on his brow, nose and right arm. His mouth looked swollen and John wondered how he managed to sleep in that twisted position that he sat.

Next at the corner of the adjoining wall, still by John’s left, was Chijioke.  The eleven years old, J.S.S.1 boy had nothing to show that he had also been beaten thoroughly.  Next huddled together by the left of Chijioke were the twins; Taye and Kehinde, the two petite J.S.S.1 girls were sleeping in each other’s arms.  “They must have been consoling themselves before they fell asleep” Thought John.

Then, his eyes glanced over at stoical Emeka, the bully, as he was secretly and resentfully nicknamed.  Tall and masculine like a married man, more like a father.  His face was all swollen.  Congealed blood was caked all over his body; it was on his mouth, nose, his stubbly cheeks, arms, thigh and foot. His yellow big boy T- shirt was torn in several places and his pockets were turned inside. The five foot Nine inches (5.9ft) tall boy – young man – looked shorter in his bounds and the way he sat.

Tunde’s face was concealed by Emeka’s legs as he lay in a horizontal awkward pose and John guessed what it looked like with the severe beating he had received. His school uniform now looked like something soaked in blood. “Was he still alive?” John wondered as he could barely see his chest heave.

His wandering eyes came to rest on two J.S.S 3 students; Born again Shola, who was lying prostrate and the other…he didn’t know her name… “Yes! I remember. Bisi! Bisi was her name yes, she is the one! The one that had had a crush, earlier in the term, on Okbe. Yes! Yes! and She was also the same girl that came to school every week with a life-size huggable teddy bear until the principal seized it one day and tore the teddy bear to shreds. She was still maturing, exactly the height and age usual of children in that class. She will turn into a damsel soon” were all John’s thought.  He looked at Shola again and said quietly to himself “After all Aman, his father wouldn’t complain.”

Chinwe, by the wall opposite John’s, stirred and his eyes wandered to her direction.  He stared at the seventeen years old, SS3 student, who didn’t look 17, more like nineteen or Twenty.  Her beautiful face was now swollen and her hair disheveled.  He looked her over again and his eyes nestled on her full firm and provocative breasts. He knew the men would have toyed with them during the beating and would’ve done the same to those of her one year younger (in age and Class) neighbour, Sandra, whose face was now also swollen.

His eyes passed on to Matthew, Matthew Igbo as he was fondly called and he chuckled as he remembered Matthew’s last words ever since they were Captured ‘person no go talk again’.  The plump, short S. S. 2 boy had since then retreated into his shell. His pimples filled face looked like a smashed pie, sprinkled with blood.

Issah Hayatu, an SS 2 science student, had eyes that had been blacked around the edges by blows, and his lips were swollen and smeared with blood just like those of his classmates, Dare (who was renowned as having only two exercise books, as his whole educational material, which he always stuck in the back pocket of his uniform. No bag, no text books, no nothing, just two exercise books) and Kemi who also had in addition cane markings on her tender angel-like skin.

Lying at the corner of the adjoining wall by the right, was fair skinned Okbe.  His slightly curved legs, which were the fastest in the school, looked broken and there was an ugly gash by his temple, buzzing with flies.  The 3 junior students sitting besides him and close to the door looked whole. Only dried up tears, lining their cheeks indicted that they had also been beaten mercilessly by the men.

Obi, The smart or illuck, was next and His eyes rested on him, Obi (a boy with a slightly stout physique). Obi the smart. Obi the ill-luck. It was believed that he had an ill-luck and so far it seemed true, through his parted split lips one could see that one incisor was off.  This was as a result of a kick he had received on the mouth. It had been more than 6 hours ago that they had been beaten mercilessly yet Blood was still dripping slowly from his mouth.

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Don’t you just Love Chimamanda?

September 21st, 2009

Author of  Half of a Yellow Sun and the Purple Hibiscus. I just visited her website at Halfofayellowsun.com and I nearly shed tears reading about the stories people were saying about the Biafra war. I never knew a Lot of atrocities were committed. I am yet to get the book though but with the reviews I have read I will get it This week.

Coming to the Author I hope I’ll have the talent to write and touch people’s heart as much as Chimamanda Does. Here first book, Purple hibiscus was a great one though I could not  finish reading it. Dear! If you have a chance get these two great books from Chimammanda.

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how do you make a lady laugh?

September 2nd, 2009

how do you make a lady laugh?
(a). Tell her a joke

or

(b). make a joke of yourself

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